Okay so to start let's talk about the first subject of this post- one step forward three steps back. It seems to be the pattern of my life. Get ahead in school, get a good boyfriend- get real sick and miss lots of school, end up splitting with boyfriend. Get love of my life, start grade twelve- move out, drop out of school. And now it's a back and forth game of "EMPLOYED AND HOUSED" and "UNEMPLOYED AND LOOKING" what the eff guys. It's like fate is playing this cruel sick joke on me repeatedly.
So I'm not actually out of a job or house yet, (I'm expecting to be let go in the next couple days because of the stunt I pulled calling in sick 20 minutes before my graveyard shift) but I can tell you at this point I'd like to be living anywhere but here. We have these new neighbours from Alberta, who seem to think they run the place immediately once they move in. Wrong. I was here first, I pay more than you, step the fuck back. See we had this party the other night (we only do this maybe once a week if that, the only reason we're doing it again this weekend is because of my boyfriends birthday) and granted it was a Sunday night- but it only ran til about 11:15pm- and they were banging on the wall for us to keep it down at 10pm. Sorry but that's a little early for me to give two shits about your sleep.
We were avoiding the walls, not screaming, I don't remember shouting, and we didn't even have music going. (Although the TV may have been kind of loud) So a few of the people at the party shout at the wall where the banging is coming from that it's our Saturday night and to fuck off. Well not last night but the night previous I hear shouting and arguing coming from them- at 4 in the bloody morning!!! You think our hours are ridiculous?? Am I missing something here? Not to mention the wreak of crack and weed in my bathroom whenever they smoke up- the only reason I haven't complained is because life wouldn't be the same without weed. That and I can't afford to get caught. So anyway, my landlord (nice old russian guy) takes me to meet the couple yesterday and work things out- and leaves me there. Gee. Thanks. So I'm talking to the girl telling her how sorry I am and how I'm going to try and take everything into consideration a little more from now on now that I know- and her husband comes out. I don't think I've ever been more positive about a drug addict than this guy. Gaunt, sunken cheeks, shakey, loud, angry, and verbally violent.
He starts mouthin off about the other night, how pissed he was about someone telling him to fuck off and how it was their Saturday and how he would have liked to have come to our front door and kicked whose ever ass it was who said it. (Nice guy, he should run for PM) He basically repeated this several times as she's trying to re-itterate more calmly so that we can come to an understanding- but by now he is yelling. Now if there's one thing I can't stand, it's being yelled at for s.f.a.. So I calmly without cursing or shouting back, said "Can you please not yell at me?" and even she said "Steve please stop yelling". It was at this point when he looked me right in the face and said "Get the fuck out of my house." (Charmer, lucky gal that one) Thus proving that his vocabulary is just as ugly as his appearance. I told her it was nice to meet her as she seemed to be a very intelligent girl (deserves better) and looked to be pregnant. (There's the reason. right there. wow if she wasn't pregnant he'd probably be single.) In any case, he fucked up by yelling at me cause I told my landlord. Needless to say he is not impressed and I'm hoping to see the last of them sometime soon. I mean- she even commented on how I need to be more quiet at night and not yell. The only thing running through my head? Sorry my husband knows my g-spot and yours doesn't know yours. Didn't I move repeatedly to avoid these kind of douche-bags? Stick it up your ass.
Now then! Since most of my internal rage is overwith now, I'm going to start on the blatantly ex-ternal. So I don't know if you've heard, but there's a new online dating kind of matchmaking or something or other site called "Beautiful People". Their online little subtitle motto? Not afraid to be controversial! Looks matter, people want to be with someone they're attracted to, it may not be politically correct but it's true!
Might I be the first to say WHAT THE FUCK IS THIS LOAD OF DONKEY COCK!?! I'm sorry but you have to be one of three things to join this club (No. Not a single one of those is beautiful.)
1. You have to have so much muscle and ego from steroids and being spoiled that your brain is rendered permanently void of any concsious or selfless thought.
2. You have to be so plastic you could beat Barbie in a wet tee shirt contest in a Texas penitentiary full of sodomists, rapists, and those who pray on brainless morons with their twat hanging out. (I.E. You at 14 and thereafter)
3. You have to be so full of yourself that you actually choke out the words "I'm effing gorgeous" every time you look in the mirror- regardless that if it was your personality's reflection it'd be cracking.
This is why little girls are sticking their fingers down their throat, posing for pictures on facebook before they've even hit puberty, wearing mini-skirts that only cover them due to the anorexia, and are quietly wishing they were dead every time they see a blonde girl with big tits and a convertable. Even guys have this issue! I know plenty of men who are spiteful towards guys with all muscle no brain. It's sad, because honestly someones intelligence can be so gorgeous it shines through everything and anything. You don't need to be blonde, tanned, ripped, plastic, perfect, shiney, and thin just to be beautiful.
Two examples (not very good ones but work with me) of Society breaking the mold- America's Next Top Model winner this year was plus sized. Good for you Tyra- you picked someone who actually weighs more than my 10 year old sister! Beauty and the Geek- one of these plastic broads are paired up with one of the ones with a gorgeous mind. Together they learn from each other and all that crap- but y'know what, when those plastic girls say on National televison "Looks aren't everything" it could help just one person. Maybe that boy who's a little overweight and wears glasses- but could make you cry whenever he sang. Or that girl who wears all black and long sleeves because she's ashamed of her body- her artwork makes even the pro's gasp. Beauty is truly in the eye of the beholder- but I don't think that means you have it whenever you look at yourself in the mirror. I believe everyone is gorgeous in their own way. Maybe it's one feature, like Annie's eyes or Billy's smile- or maybe it's their talent like that boys voice or that girls paintings. Or yes, maybe it's their physical features.
But beware all you beautiful people out there, for physicality is only immortally beautiful if your personality can still see it through. If you are so conceited as to join this club and believe in all those values- then congratulations. You have just become, in and of itself, Beauty and the Beast. All in one person. What a fucking acheivement you are- go choke down some more diet pills and run on the treadmill your daddy bought you before you plan to go get so drunk you puke while fucking some random stranger in an alley. Because that is exactly what you are. You disgust me.
Iris aus.
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